Silent Exchange
by Alannawanabe
Summary: Every KelNeal fans heart broke as Yuki handed her fan to Neal. I am trying to explore Kel's feeling and actions after she realised what was happening. Short story, please read and review Now Finished -x-x-x-
1. Realisation

**A/N: hello! This is going to be a short entry, im going to try and re-write a part of Tamora's book! I don't know about other Kel/Neal fans but my heart broke when we realised that Neal was getting married, because secretly I was still hoping it would be Kel! Lol! Anyway, hope this is enjoyable, but the only way I know is if you review, so please do!**

**Disclaimer: all characters etc. is the sole right of Tamora Pierce including the bit in '' marks at the beginning!**

**Enjoy:**

**Love AlannaWanabe**

**-x-**

'Neal stumbled towards the door. As he reached where Kel stood with Yuki, he paused and raised his eyebrow in a silent question to Yuki. Silently she reached out and handed him her fan, Neal's face broke into a smile and he made his way out of the chapel"

Kel watched this silent exchange of a promise with a sudden understanding. Neal and Yuki. Who would have guessed? Certainly not Kel, his _best_ friend. The shock of this exchange struck Kel like a sword piercing through her heart. Breath came short and her muscles tensed uncontrollably until she was forced to sit down, for fear of falling over.

Yuki turned to her, big brown eyes full with suppressed emotion.

"Kel?" she enquired

"Its just relief Yuki. I was scared for _my _best friend", breathed Kel, unable to resist putting emphasis on the 'my' part of the sentence.

"So were we all Kel, so were we all" replied Yuki calmly. Something about the way Yuki said this stilled the raging in Kel's stomach, Yuki really did love Neal. Kel was not sure whether she wanted to hug Yuki or run her through! She did neither instead she got up and walked swiftly away.

For a reason even Kel couldn't explain; instead of returning to her room she headed in the direction of Balor's needle. After an agonising climb to the top, Kel settled herself down on the topmost ledge and opened her eyes. Taking in the view of Corus and trying desperately hard to keep breathing. Stilling her thumping heart Kel breathed deeply and efficiently until she was positive that she wouldn't cry. Once the risk of tears had gone, Kel forced herself to think about she was desperately trying not to think about; Neal and Yuki. Together. Engaged.

A jealous bile arose in her throat at the very thought. Kel introduced them. Yuki was Kel's friend and Neal, well Neal was complicated. They were friends, but did she want more? It was too late now whatever she wanted. Regret at not having told Neal her feelings at the time set in, casting a bitter case over her heart. But, if she had told Neal, would she have lost him completely? The wind lashed against her face and she realised why she had come up here, with the ridiculous thought that the wind would remove the pain. She saw now this was ridiculous. She would never recover. Kel knew her questions could never be answered, but still they came flooding into her mind. Would he have asked her? Would she be the one handing him her fan?

Sitting at the top of Balor's needle, rain trickling down on top her; wind lashing her cheeks, Kel broke and wept openly.


	2. Like a Bat Out of Hell

**A/N: Thanks to all of my reviewers, 'tear, tear' you have no idea how happy i am to get a review, yes i do lead a sad life! lol! anyway enough about me. By changing things i mean absolutly no disrespect to the legend that is Tamora Pierce! um.. also i think that Kel and Cleon had broken up before Neal's ordeal, as they had broken up before Kels! i think, i could be wrong it has been known to happen! lol, anyway i hope you all enjoy this, please let me know either way! **

**enjoy**

**Love AlannaWanabe**

**x-x-x**

The next morning Kel woke miserable and tired. Forcing herself to go to breakfast Kel caught sight of Neal walking towards her. Kel slammed down her tray and ran out the dinning hall like a bat out of hell. The bitterness in Kel's heart had shrunk down to more a slight regret at what could have been. Kel realised that she loved Neal but she was not in love with him. Kel was his best friend. There was the problem. He was her best friend and he hadn't bothered telling her that he was courting Yuki, let alone marrying her! How could he have done this to her? Kel's head swam at the thought of her own best friend didn't tell her the most important thing in his life. Already Yuki was stealing him. Claiming secrets that Kel should know, what would happen when they were married? Kel wouldn't be able to see him! Their friendship would be over. **Ended.**

"Kel" called a familiar voice.

"Mithros" Kel breathed, Neal was the last person she wanted to see, but probably the one she needed to most.

"Where did you go at breakfast, I missed you"

"Don't lie!" snapped Kel, hurt Neal continued,

"Um... Kel, I've got something to tell you."

"It can wait, I'm busy"

"It can't Kel. I need to talk now. What are you doing anyway?"

"Thinking" Neal laughed and clapped her on the shoulder.

"Listen old friend, thinking can wait. You're meatheads getting married"

"Oh really." Said Kel casually

"What's the matter with you? Did you hear what I said?" exclaimed Neal excitedly.

"I heard," said Kel, trying desperately to keep all the emotion out of her voice.

"DON'T YOU EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHO TO?" shouted Neal, getting very agitated.

"Not particularly" came the short reply

"What?"

"Im not trying to be rude Neal but I did say I had things to do."

"Kel, I've just told you the most important news of my life and you don't care!"

"That's exactly it Nealen, you JUST told me"

"What?"

"Obviously you didn't just ask the unlucky lady so when did it all start? Or is it to much to ask you to tell you're best friend about you relationship?" asked Kel, brimming with sarcasm

"Kel, honestly, she only agreed yesterday"

"Well why didn't you tell me you were courting someone?"

"I didn't want it to go wrong!" exclaimed Neal.

"Is she so special then, this girl" sneered Kel, pulling a most unattractive face,

"Yes kel, she is. Otherwise I wouldn't be marrying her!"

"Who is it?" she stated bluntly.

"Yuki isn't that great, im so lucky! La la la" sung Neal, dancing around.

"Umm....." hummed Kel, playing with her cropped hair.

"Kel, seriously, I know it's a bit sudden but try and be happy for us we are all meant to be friends!"

"No Neal, you and I are friends. Yuki and I are friends. You and Yuki barely know each other"

"That's changed slightly recently, you see me and Yuki know each other pretty well nowadays"

"I don't want to know about you stupid little relationship, its just going to end the way all you're other crushes have ended"

"Kel if I didn't know you better id say you were jealous!" shouted Neal

"Well you obviously don't know me better at all then!"

"What are you saying? You are jealous?"

"No, I never said that. Just leave me alone" muttered Kel, seemingly very interested in a mark on the ground.

"Kel we need to talk about this, don't walk away kel." Neal grabbed the elbow of a retreating Kel.

"Go away, I don't want to talk to you" retorted Kel, shrugging Neal's hand off.

"Fine kel, its fine. Don't expect an invite"

With that Neal walked away leaving a furious kel standing in the pathway.


	3. A Window to a Garden

**A/N: Hey guys and gals. Once again a tremendous thank you to all those who are reviewing, keep it up! Lol! Um... on the advice of one reviewer I went back over chapter two and added in some description of the characters during the conversation, so if PsychoLioness13 wouldn't mind having a quick look back to tell me if it has improved any I would be really grateful, and thanks for the advice!**

**Enjoy;**

**Love Alanna Wanabe**

Neal trudged down the corridor, head bent down. Why? Why would Kel be acting so, so, un Kel like? The one person whose support he thought he could depend on totally, was rejecting him. It didn't make sense. Kel was his best friend, Yuki was Kel's friend, shouldn't Kel be happy for them? Another thing, why did Kel act so odd when he said she was jealous, obviously he knew Kel wasn't jealous, if she liked him like that then obviously she would have told him by now, right? I mean they are close but, well, more brother and sister close than anything more, from Neal's perspective anyway. Maybe he should talk to Kel about it, Neal quickly shrugged this thought off, Kel would just hide behind her Yamini face if he even brought the subject up, and he would not get anything out of her when she went like that. Anyway, he was not speaking to her, she had hurt him. He would speak to Kel, when she spoke to him.

'Fool' muttered Kel to herself, what had she nearly let slip? 'Fool, fool, fool, I thought that I had gotten over this'. Kel reprimanded herself repeatedly during her drill, over and over went the conversation in her head. Why? Was the main question she asked herself, why couldn't she have lied and said how happy she was? Why couldn't she have just given him a hug and said congratulations? Why? Deep inside Kel knew why, it hurt too much. Kel had trouble admitting she was hurt to herself let alone Neal. The worst part was that she nearly told him how she was feeling, felt. What would have happened if she had not been able to draw on her Yamini training? Kel shuddered at the thought, 'I just have to make sure it doesn't happen again' said Kel to herself as she wandered up to her room.

Regretfully Kel felt the now familiar sense of bitterness creeping up on her at the sight of Yuki and Neal walking in the garden together, Kel was sitting upon her window ledge looking out on the extensive gardens of the palace. The wind rustled ruthlessly through the branches and whipped across the flower heads, Yuki and Neal however, seemed oblivious of the weather, and indeed anything apart from each other. Kel found herself finding the scene quite touching; Neal was behaving in a way alien, even to Kel. Sitting on her window ledge, Kel watched the scene unfold before her, reaching out Neal gently brushed a strand of Yuki's hair out of her face, his hand lingering lovingly on her soft skin, Yuki looked up at him through lowered lashes and smiled. This was the moment, this precise moment, that Kel realised nothing could ever be between her and Neal. She was Neal's comrade, his friend, this was how he acted with those he loved; Kel found the weight of resentment shift slightly, breath came easily again, and Kel took in the evening breeze, watching the two young lovers stroll contently through the gardens.


	4. Tough Love

**A/N: hello, thank you for all of your reviews, its sad but I do like getting them! Lol.... Anywayz, I hope that you are all enjoying the story, hope that I got kel back into character last chapter, I did try! P.S. just got my copy of tricksters queen! AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! IM SO EXCITED TO READ IT!! As usual review review review MWAH**

**Enjoy**

**Love Alanna Wanabe**

'Kel?' Kel sighed inwardly at the voice, what did she want?

'Kel, are you in there? Kel its me, open up' Begrudgingly Kel got up from her bed and made her way over to the door, slowly and cautiously Kel opened it up to reveal a beaming Yuki.

'Yuki!' exclaimed Kel

'Hello stranger, have you been avoiding me?' laughed Yuki, as she walked purposefully through Kel's door.

'Um... Actually Yuki I was just about to practise my glaive, maybe you should stop by later' rambled Kel, avoiding the question not very subtly. Yuki laughed loudly,

'Don't be silly, I'll practise with you! It's much more fun with two people' Kel groaned, 'well done Kel' she said to herself, 'you should give lessons, open mouth, insert foot'

'Oh, thanks Yuki, that would be, um... lovely, as long as you don't have somewhere else to be' said Kel, with a touch of hope in her last question.

Yuki rolled her eyes as she picked up Kel's spare glaive, 'Begin' she commanded, Kel's body fell into the familiar routine, Yuki lead the practise to start with, leading them both through a mixture of the simpler dances, before going into free style. Kel felt herself relax and soon she was on autopilot, blocking Yuki's moves as easily as breathing. Much to Kel's surprise Yuki sped up her moves, forming complex patterns, Kel was forced to use all of her wits to avoid being maimed by the deadly blade. Suddenly Yuki bent and swept the blunt end of the glaive into the back of Kel's knees forcing Kel to the ground, lowering the blade to Kel's chest in one movement, Yuki said, 'Right, now you can't wiggle out of it, why have you been avoiding me? I know you and Neal had that stupid fight but we both miss you'

'Neal told you... about, about our fight?' said Kel, breathless, amazed and betrayed all at once. Neal had done just what Kel had feared, told Yuki their secrets.

'Of course he did, he was upset, im his betrothed.' Replied Yuki impatiently,

'So I heard' said Kel dryly. Yuki laughed heartily,

'You know you sounded exactly like Neal then!' giggled Yuki, releasing Kel from her blade.

'Hahaha' said kel sarcastically, 'we are best friends you know'

'Yes Kel, I do know. Moreover, the last thing I want is to drive a wedge between the both of you. I thought that we were friends. What's happening with all of us?'

'I don't see the problem' replied Kel trying to keep her face yamini straight.

'Kel, I'm Yamini, I can see through that, look I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Neal and I, but I kept thinking it was a joke and one day I was going to wake up and he was going to say 'oh silly you Yuki, as if I would ever love you', and how daft would I have looked if I had told everyone?'

'I'm not everyone' said Kel quietly.

'I know, and I can see we hurt you, but Kel, we love each other and we love you. Neither of us wants to see you hurt' Yuki kissed Kel on her cheek and strolled out the room as if nothing had happened.

Kel sat for a long time after Yuki left, thinking over things. Kel had to admit she was grateful to Yuki for coming and talking to her, she knew that both herself and Neal were too stubborn to talk to each other. Kel giggled to herself, 'maybe we do need Yuki, otherwise we wouldn't be able to communicate at all'. Kel had to give Yuki her due; she had talked a lot of sense. Of course, Neal and Yuki would talk to each other about their hurts, Kel had to get over the fact that she was not the only sensible person in Neal's life anymore and there were going to be things that Neal would feel more comfortable telling his wife. Surely that was the point of being married! Kel drew in a deep breath, so she had to learn to share, she could do that. She had become a squire to one of the most powerful men in Tortall against all odds; she had commanded a squad of the King's Own in battle, if she could do that, she could handle a little thing like sharing. After all Neal had enough love for both of them, or so Kel placed her hope.

Kel pulled on a clean shirt and marched down the corridor towards the dinner hall.


	5. No More I Love Yous

**A/N: thank you for all of your reviews, I find myself saying ,this at least once with each story I write, I believe that fan fiction is a chance for us mere mortals to toy with other peoples characters and manipulate them until they resemble how we would like them to be, or how we envisage them to be. Therefore, I will do what I want with each the wonderful characters that the great Tamora has given us to work with. I want to progress as a writer and eventually be able to make up my own characters that someone else will want to toy with! So... now, ive got that off my chest. I would like to just say ahhhhhhh! How good is Tricksters Queen? Ah... amazing! Wished she'd gon eback with them though! Shame.... Anyway... keep reviewing and tell me how I can improve my writing skills. Thanks**

**Enjoy;**

**Love AlannaWanabe **

**-x-**

'Nealen?' Neal turned his head away as if he hadn't heard anything.

'Don't make me hurt you Nealen. I know you can hear me' Despite himself, a flicker of a smile crossed his lips. Kel saw this and mirroed it in her on her own face. Drawing up a chair Kel sat down next to Neal. An exaggerated sigh came from Neal as he turned and looked directly at Kel.

'Well, I suppose I have nothing better to do.' This time Kel turned her head away and began to whistle. Kel glanced behind her and caught sight of Neal's bemused face, unable to control herself Kel started giggling helplessly.

'Oh all right, if we must be grown up, I came to try and apologise.'

'You may have engaged my interest' drawled Neal.

'You're not going to make this easy are you?' questioned Kel. Neal replied by shrugging his shoulders. 'Fine, look I'm sorry I got angry with you. I was just upset and well, you were happy and it made me even angrier. Okay happy now?'

'Apology accepted, and im sorry I didn't tell you, but I thought you would think it just another crush and roll your eyes at me.' Kel laughed,

'You could have explained it to me, im not that insensitive, I would have understood'

'But, you never have crushes, or fall head over heels, even with Cleon you were very secretive and I didn't even know you liked him until you were, well you know, seeing him. You don't tell me everything you know.' Kel looked up into Neal's eyes and held his gaze. This was her best friend, the silly one, and here he was telling her something that made complete sense and she hadn't even thought of it. What was happening to them?

'I'm sorry that I hurt you by not telling you, but it was the last thing I wanted. Kel I love you, I would never want to upset you' Kel pondered on how long she had waited for Neal to say he loved her, hoped and wished for it. She had wanted it in other circumstances, she had wanted a declaration of true passionate love that would last forever. Then Kel realised that this was the circumstance that made most sense, they were best friends who loved each other and this love _would _most definatly last forever. Kel looked up to see Neal looking at her with very puzzled eyes.

'I love you too meathead' replied Kel.

'I know, otherwise I wouldn't have said it my sweet' Kel punched him playfully on the arm, at the same time noticing the look of relief on Neal's face.

'You know meathead, I can still beat you, so if I were you, id be watching my tongue'

'Why, what's it doing? And leaving my tongue out the conversation, you could never and will never be able to beat me my dear, so give up the act' said Neal, the picture of innocence. Before Kel had time to think of a witty response, a familiar voice drawled.

'Meathead... How nice to see you, Lady Kel.' Dom dropped onto his knees and kissed Kel's hand, looking up at her with glittering eyes.

'It's been too long oh flower of my heart.' Kel smiled, but inside her heart fluttered like crazy, calm yourself said Kel to herself, you are a knight, not some silly noble woman.

'Likewise, oh cousin of Meathead' Dom laughed as he rose to his feet. He slapped Neal round the shoulders,

'What's this I hear of you getting betrothed? Could it be you're finally growing up?'

'Im doing a better job than you are, where's your betrothed? Oh yes sorry, I forget myself, you don't have one, but I do! Hehehe, who's more grown up now?' Dom clapped Neal around the ear.

'I haven't found the right person yet,' as he said this Dom's eyes lingered longingly on Kel, 'But Im sure she's around here somewhere. Come on then, tell me all about this wonder woman who is prepared to tame _the meathead_ ' Still blushing from Dom's earlier look Kel made her excuses and walked away looking very thoughtful.

'Did I miss something?' asked Dom faking innocence.

'Dom, I may be in love but im not stupid, you like Kel'

'Of course I like Kel, who doesn't'

'You knew what I meant and don't pretend you didn't, so do you like her or not? I could put in a word if you want me to.'

'Shut up meathead, even if I did like Kel it would be none of your business and I certainly wouldn't want you putting words in anywhere, you were telling me about Yuki?' Neal's attention diverted back onto his favourite subject, he chattered on about Yuki, while Dom's bright eye's drifted over to where Kel was walking, slowly she turned her head and Dom caught her eye. Kel smiled and Dom felt his pulse beat just a little faster, he returned the smile and both stood transfixed, until Raoul called out to Kel. With a last glance at Dom Kel ran swiftly towards where Raoul stood, Dom took in a deep breath and turned back to Neal's ranting, maybe he did like Kel after all.....

**A/N: that's it for this story, thanks for staying with me. I know it was short but it was just meant to serve as an inset into Tamora's story, I know I went overboard with the look between Kel and Dom, but I couldn't leave her without anyone! Lol... and Tamora did suggest! Anyway thanks for all your reviews and I would really appreciate you reviewing this chapter for me.**

**Love you all **

**AlannaWanabe**

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-**


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